


be bold be bold

by Feather (lalaietha)



Series: (even if i could) make a deal with god [your blue-eyed boys related short-fic] [37]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Bucky has a thing for strays, Cancer, Disabled Character, Gen, Just Add Kittens, Major Illness, Mentally Ill Character, POV Outsider, Protective Bucky Barnes, Teenagers, emotional whiplash, kids who recognize Captain America, kids who recognize the Winter Soldier, ordinary tragedies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-29
Updated: 2014-07-29
Packaged: 2018-02-10 21:16:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2040462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lalaietha/pseuds/Feather
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>James gives her a look that's just about as good as any she's got from him yet, so Mercedes tries to keep her face wide-eyed and blank in case it gets better.</p>
            </blockquote>





	be bold be bold

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is part of [**this series**](http://archiveofourown.org/series/132585), which is for short-fic associated with my fic [**your blue-eyed boys**](http://archiveofourown.org/series/107477), because I needed somewhere to stash it. 
> 
> This was on a Hurt/Comfort Bingo prompt: cuddling

Something's wrong. Mercedes isn't sure what it is - she never is, because there's so many things. But her mother's on edge, to the point that when her uncle forgets that Jaime can't have _anything_ with wheat in it without getting sick to his stomach for ages, Mama has it out with him right over the phone, almost shouting in Spanish and in English. 

And Mama never shouts. 

Mercedes takes that as a hint, as much as she can, and tries to stay out of the way; she makes sure she packs for school before she goes to bed, that kind of thing. Jaime predictably stays sick and stays home, but he's only six so missing school doesn't mean that much. He can learn just as much at home from the computer or from Mercedes. 

Probably more, really. There's no rowdy kids at home. 

On Saturday her uncle visits and he and her mother make up, sort of. Mercedes puts up with about half an hour of her uncle finding things to complain about about her clothes or her hair or how her knees and elbows are always scraped up before she goes out and starts running. 

She doesn't get new scrapes on purpose - actually she's getting better and even if it's a bit annoying, James was right, doing strength-exercises every night _is_ helping - but she is kind of spitefully glad that her uncle's still there (getting ready to leave, but still there) when she gets back in, so she can pointedly ignore his disapproving face while she cleans out the new scrape on her arm and paints New Skin on them. 

 

On Sunday morning Mercedes runs into Hannah and LeAnn in the back courtyard with the cardboard kitten box, both of her friends looking kind of down; when she gets close enough, Mercedes sees there's still the same three kittens in the box as last time. 

"I still can't have one," she tells them, when she recognizes the box. "Not unless someone cured extreme allergies since yesterday." She's actually kind of really sad about that, but not sad enough to risk being the reason Jaime coughs himself to death. 

She'll admit to looking up hypoallergenic cat breeds, though. Like a Sphynx. She'd have to give it baths a lot, but she can do that. 

The point is, she can't take one of the strays LeAnn and Hannah found outside, no matter how desperate they are.

"Well," LeAnn says slowly, "we got people to take _most_ of them, and Mr Tate says he'll take two out of what's left if we can't find anyone else, but in a week or two after his daughter comes and gets her cat and takes him to the new place. And Dad's really kind of not happy about the wait. And we've asked pretty much everywhere - " 

"But not _quite_ everywhere," Hannah interrupts, and LeAnn scowls at her. "What?" Hannah demands. "It's true." 

"So why are you standing here looking like someone's about to axe-murder you?" Mercedes demands and LeAnn scowls even harder while Hannah rolls her eyes. 

"There's _three_ kittens left," she says, "and someone," and here Hannah elbows LeAnn, "is being a _total princess_ about knocking at 403." 

"I am not," LeAnn says, kicking at Hannah's ankle and missing, and losing her flip-flop while she's at it. 

Mercedes feels her eyebrows go up; she knows exactly who lives in 403. "You mean you haven't asked _Captain America_ if he wants a kitten yet?" she demands and this time LeAnn rolls her eyes. 

"I still don't think he's - " 

"Seriously?" Mercedes interrupts, taking her turn to scowl. "Seriously we're gonna have this argument again?" 

She's actually starting to get offended about this, when it comes down to it, and she's pretty sure LeAnn's just being pig-stubborn about not recognizing Steve Rogers to start with. If she admits she does now, she loses face or something, or that's how LeAnn would see it. She could be dumb like that. It's not like Mercedes's going to gloat. She's just tired of being almost called a liar. 

"Anyway," LeAnn says, backing down a little bit, "Hannah saw him leave an hour ago." 

Mercedes looks up, backing off herself. "Light's on," she points out, "so James's home." 

LeAnn gives her a disbelieving look and even Hannah side-eyes a little. "And that's a good thing?" LeAnn says, her voice going way up in pitch at the end. 

"Well your deadline's tonight before the extra one goes to the shelter, your dad's kind of a dick about that stuff, maybe he'll get a kitten for Steve. You never know." Mercedes frowns at Hannah and LeAnn both. "Seriously, you guys are afraid? He's cool." 

"Yeah, yeah," LeAnn sneers, "Mercedes the fearless, like you've ever talked to him." 

Actually if LeAnn doesn't watch it, she's going to end up in a fight. Again. Mercedes holds onto her temper and pulls her pendant out from under her shirt. LeAnn rolls her eyes. 

Hannah gives them both a nervous look. "Guys," she starts, but Mercedes has pretty much had enough. 

"Gimme the box," she says. "No, seriously, gimme the box right now." And she reaches over and yanks it out of LeAnn's hands, the kittens all three of them protesting the sudden movement.

She thinks better of this, of all of it, the second she does it but just - it's not _like_ she's trying to one up anybody or be special or anything, she's just really really tired of people implying either she's stupid or fibbing, and she's had enough of it, so if this is how it goes down - 

Hopefully she won't regret this in, like, fifteen minutes or less. 

"Hey!" LeAnn protests, and trails after Mercedes as she marches inside and hits the elevator button. 

It's as slow as ever and she doesn't really need the time to think things over - anything but - but she doesn't really want to carry the box up the stairs, especially since now she woke them up the kittens keep trying to climb out of the box. There's three of them, a tuxedo one, a tabby one and an orange tabby one, and Mercedes frowns at the third as it flails around and falls over. 

"What's up with the orange kitty?" she asks, when LeAnn and Hannah catch up to her. "They're old enough their eyes should be open." 

"What are you _doing_?" LeAnn demands, ignoring the question so Mercedes ignores her for a second; but Hannah answers with a sigh and a sad face, which she's pretty good at.

"Chloe says he's got some kind of infection. We've been putting drops on it, but she said it'll probably never see right and might have to have an operation to take the eyes out. It's why we're having such a hard time," she adds chewing on her lip. "S'hard enough to get people to take kitties period, but who wants one who's sick already?" 

Chloe was the vet-student who lived on the ground floor, one of the renters, who must've looked at the kittens for free or cheap or trading housework or something. The building can be nice for that - like Mercedes knows one of the families a floor up from hers around the east wing cleans Miss Anita's place (bird-cages included) in exchange for her son's dance lessons. Besides, Chloe's cool. 

"I'm going upstairs to see if James wants a kitten," Mercedes says to LeAnn. "Obviously. Or if he thinks Steve'll want a kitten." She shifts the box in her arms and the orange kitty falls over again. Trying to keep it light, she adds, "Seriously _Captain America_ lives in our building you can't not ask him if he wants to rescue a kitten, that's like, infinitely wrong on all levels." 

Then Mercedes kind of loses her grip on her tone and thinks her voice gets a little bit nasty when she says, "Besides, apparently some people think I tell lies." Despite not really meaning to. 

LeAnn's still frowning, but it's not a scowl now, it's like she's worried; the door for the elevator dings open and she says, "Look, Mercy - I didn't mean - " 

"Look," Mercedes says to cut her off, because she doesn't want to have this conversation again either, the one where LeAnn sort of apologizes but still doesn't believe her, "you can shut up and get in or I'm going up without you. Up to you." 

And Hannah's already stepped in, and even looks a little bit excited-nervous, so LeAnn doesn't really have a choice. Well, she does, but like, not one she wants to make. 

"And I dunno why you have such a hard time believing me," Mercedes says. "Even people like Captain America have to live somewhere and you did a paper on him, you know he was born in Brooklyn." 

"That kind of thing doesn't just happen," LeAnn protests. Mercedes shrugs. 

"Has to happen to somebody. Why not us?" 

"Yeah, but," Hannah says, doubtfully, "then his friend probably is the guy from DC-14 - " 

"Yeah, and," Mercedes interrupts, "I told you that, I told you what he told me, we got attacked by aliens in 2012, London got attacked by, like, elves in '13 too, I seriously don't see what the problem is." Wow. She did not actually expect to get that all, like, defensive about it, but she is. 

"So you're just going to walk up and ask a mass-murdering assassin if he wants a kitten because you talked to him about free-running on the roof sometime?" LeAnn demands, folding her arms, and wow is Mercedes happy the elevator is slow enough that the doors aren't open when she says that. 

And she takes a deep breath so she manages to keep her voice level. "You really need to catch up with this," she says. "Now shut up," she adds as the elevator doors slide open, "I told you they can both hear really good, too." 

"Yeah, but - " LeAnn says, actually _raising_ her voice because Merceces is walking out down the corridor, so that Mercedes turns around and hisses _Shhh!_ at her. 

"Seriously I just said be quiet!" she tries to sort of . . . snap as quietly as she can. It probably doesn't work so great. 

Mercedes is seriously unimpressed with the way Hannah and LeAnn hang back - not just because it means they're being scaredy _and_ doubting her word again, but because what, do they think it looks less like they're _with_ Mercedes . She knocks, and okay mayyyybe it's a little louder than she meant it to be since she's refusing to let Hannah or LeAnn get the wrong impression by being tentative. 

But, you know, okay - meeting on the roof or down by the wall aside, coat and necklace aside, other than for the chocolates that once ages ago, this is the first time she's actually come knocking. 

When James answers the door it's without a shirt and with the annoyed look of someone who is answering the door without a shirt because they weren't planning on, you know, answering the door at all and decided the world can deal with it. 

Mercedes wrinkles her nose. "I totally woke you up," she says, and shoves the part of her brain going _oh_ wow _that's a nasty looking scar_ way back in her mind. It is, though. She didn't realize the prosthetic went all the way up over his shoulder. That had to have _hurt_. 

"Yeah," he says. "When you got out of the elevator." He gives her a Look that's kinda amused enough that she figures it was the part where she was telling the other girls to shush that did it. But if she hadn't, they'd've kept talking and that would have been even more embarrassing. For them. 

Because she's not embarrassed. 

"Sorry," she says, and holds up the box. "Want a kitten?"

James gives her a look that's just about as good as any she's got from him yet, so Mercedes tries to keep her face wide-eyed and blank in case it gets better. 

"If somebody doesn't take one," she says, "then one is gonna have to go to the shelter all by itself because there's probably a home for the other two but just two because - well I dunno actually he just said just two, and if there's three to pick then the one who can't see'll probably be the one who goes and they never get adopted because nobody wants a messed up pet." She runs back over the speech and adds, "And my friends already asked everybody else." 

She _does_ get an even better look. It's a fantastic look, actually. He'd reached in and tilted the box forward when she first held it up, frowning at the kittens, but now it's all look. Or a Look, even. "You practice that guilt-trip all the way up?" he demands, and she grins. 

"Nope!" she says cheerfully. "Completely spontaneous. It's like I have a gift." 

The tuxedo kitten's trying to climb out of the box again, so Mercedes catches it and dumps it back in; the tabby one's curled up sleeping in the corner. But the orange tabby thinks James' hand smells interesting or something, because it's up on its hind legs sniffing at it. James looks back at the kitten, and then at Mercedes, and then at the other two girls (and that's not a very impressed look) and then at the kitten for almost long enough to be uncomfortable, then back at Mercedes with like the most irritated but still, like, tolerant look she's ever seen, it's great. 

"You might have a great future in telethons, if someone doesn't shoot you for blackmail first," he says, and scoops that kitten up. Mercedes beams at him and he says, "Now be quiet, and get lost, kid." 

She grins, but stops short of quite blowing a kiss because, well, there are such things as pushing too far and besides he pretty much closed the door and pointedly locked it - she can hear the bolt rattle - so there's no point. She walks back down the hall to the elevator with the other two and maybe she's swaggering a little, because LeAnn's staring with huge eyes and Hannah looks impressed. 

Which is stupid, because seriously if you think about anything for even one second you know Captain America's not rooming with someone who's gonna shoot you for knocking on the door, but whatever. But she puts a finger to her lips until the elevator door closes. 

"There," she says, shoving the box back at LeAnn. "No sweat." 

"You are nuts," LeAnn says, wrapping her arms around the box.

"If that's not Captain America's friend, how's it nuts?" Mercedes asks, making her voice nasty-sweet. 

Hanna winces. LeAnn looks unhappy. "Look, she says, "I'm sorr - " 

"I don't want you to be sorry," Mercedes interrupts her. "I just want you to stop thinking I'm stupid." She shrugs. It's a totally fake-casual shrug, but - she doesn't want this to be a big deal. She just hates people not believing her. 

"Yeah," LeAnn says a bit quieter than usual. "Okay. Thanks for helping with the kittens, anyway." 

 

When she opens the door at home, Mercedes hears her mother calling her name in the same kind of quiet-whisper-call she'd tried upstairs. "Just a second!" she calls back the same way. "I gotta wash my hands and change my shirt, I was touching kittens." 

After she gets changed and all possible dander cleaned off, she goes to find her mother in the living-room, stuck under her brother who's fast asleep. Which is pretty good; Mercedes knows he hasn't been sleeping very well the last few days, because of his tummy, and it's Saturday and Mama doesn't have to work. 

"Be an angel and get me some more tea, my love," her mother says, handing her a cup. "Should be under the tea-cozy. What were you doing with kittens?" 

Which is exactly like Mama, asking questions right when she sends you away to go do something. Mercedes doesn't bother answering until after she's put the milk, sugar and tea all in the cup and brought it back to the glass side-table. 

"Helping Lee-lee and Hannah get the kittens adopted," she says, maybe using LeAnn's baby-nickname because she's still a bit annoyed and trying to remind herself that she really does love LeAnn even if she's a jerk sometimes. "Well, one of them anyways." 

She sits down on the floor in front of the couch and leans her head on her mother's lap beside where her brother's one leg rests. Her mother smoothes her hand over Mercedes' hair a few times. "You found somewhere for it?" 

"Yeah," she says, and then wonders if she should say, if it's going to end up with her mother telling her not to be a bother to people again. "Actually I went and saw if James wanted it," and she hesitates for a minute because her mother usually gets a bit iffy about her using just grownups' first names, except _Mr James_ sounds like she's, like, six and she it's not that she doesn't know what his last name is, it's just . . . that's not the one he gave her. 

She thinks he might be weird about names. 

"Did you?" her mother says, with a kind of voice that Mercedes doesn't know, her hand resting on Mercedes' head. "Well," she says. "That's good. Pets are good for healing." 

Mercedes hesitates for a minute, because she's never actually asked, not since Jaime got all excited about it the time when Steve came down to ask about the chocolates and Mama told him to hush, but - "Mama?" She sits up to look at her mother. "Do you believe me? About Steve and James. Who they are. I just - " 

She stops, because her mother looks really tired, actually. Maybe even like she's been crying. She definitely doesn't have her makeup on, and Mama always put her makeup on. 

"Yes, angel," she says, and tucks Mercedes' hair behind her ear, and the relief is kind of like letting go of a really heavy weight. Except then that relief is _suddenly all gone_ when her mother goes on, "Actually, James came to talk to me yesterday." 

Before Mercedes can get finished having a heart attack or trying to think of what she could possibly have done wrong, her mother goes on, "He told me he knew it was none of his business, and that normally he would mind his own, but that you were . . . too smart not to figure things out. And even if it wasn't fair or I didn't want you to, you would know when things are wrong, even if I don't tell you. And not knowing for sure would be worse than knowing, even if it was bad." 

All of that goes in Mercedes' ears, but it doesn't really . . . _stick_ , it doesn't make sense; but she looks at her brother sleeping and asks, "Is the cancer back?" and then bites the inside of her mouth to keep from crying when her mother sighs. 

"We don't know for sure," she says. "I took him to get tests done when he was sick last month, that was why I was arguing with the insurance, they said it wasn't mandated - anyway. His white blood cell count is a little bit higher than it should be. They can't see anything else wrong yet but - there's new tests they can do, of the bone marrow, that say for sure. The sooner we know, the better chance." 

Mercedes nods, carefully. Her mama puts one hand along side her cheek. 

"I'm sorry, baby," she says and Mercedes shakes her head. 

"It's not your fault," she says. And then she asks, "Can I . . .stay home tomorrow? Then Jaime doesn't have to go to Tía's and we can play Mario Kart or something. It's just Spanish and History and PE, it's not like I need to go to those." 

Her mother doesn't answer right away. Just leans forward, kisses the top of Mercedes' head, and rests her cheek there for a while.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Want a Kitten?](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7647007) by [danceswchopstck](https://archiveofourown.org/users/danceswchopstck/pseuds/danceswchopstck)
  * [[Podfic] be bold be bold](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7669396) by [echolalaphile](https://archiveofourown.org/users/echolalaphile/pseuds/echolalaphile)




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